Meaningful Conversations Start with BioGraffs

Like journaling, BioGraffs is a powerful tool for self-reflection. You can use it to think through complex emotions, clarify your thoughts, and visualize your inner story. It’s a great way to get perspective on what you’re feeling or experiencing before you bring it into a conversation with someone else. But unlike journaling, it's not so focused on words and composing sentences. It creates more access to your right brain, where the emotions live By arranging the cubes, you can better understand your own thoughts, identify patterns, and even work through personal challenges. Whether you’re using it to gain clarity for yourself or to prepare for a conversation, BioGraffs can help you process emotional topics.

There's two ways! The first way is to simply think about what's been on your mind or how you've been feeling about something. Is there something you've been thinking about a lot? Make a BioGraff about it. The other way to to browse through the categories on the title-picker, right here on this website. There 15 different life categories and each one has lot of BioGraff-making ideas to inspire you.

Nope. You can do BioGraffs with things you might have around your house. Anything that is small, that you have a lot of, that come in different colors or shapes. You can do it with candy, little pieces of colored paper, nuts and berries - though the BioGraffs kits are nice with wooden magnetic cubes and whiteboards and support materials. So you can try it out right now! You can also use the online BioGraffs virtual tool from your desktop, under resources in the menu.

Once you've decided what your BioGraff is about, the next step is to assign meaning to the cubes. What are the parts of this story you are going to tell? When you think of the topic of your BioGraff, what are the thoughts, feelings, events, actions, or ideas that come to mind? Write down a word or two for each and put a colored cube next to each one. Now each part of your story is represented by a different colored cube. Play with the cubes and arrange them in a way that says more about your story. Maybe you arrange them like a timeline, where it shows the order of events or feelings. Maybe you arrange them in a design that shows connections between thoughts and feelings. You can literally play with your thoughts and feelings outside your head!

Yes! BioGraffs is very effective in a clinical setting either with couples, family, or with individuals. Check out the testimonials for things therapists say about using this method with clients. If you are a therapists, you will want a set for your therapy toolbox! If you are a client, suggest it to your therapist, or bring them a BioGraff you made and talk about it in session. BioGraffs is a totally unique tool to use with your clients, whatever the modality: ​ To help clients who are caught up in their own stories To help people get distance from their story (externalize) To help people talk about hard topics, with you or with a partner To help clients share their life experiences with you To help clients talk about traumatic experiences safely To gain clarity on confusing issues For clients who feel stuck For clients when you are feeling stuck For couples to understand each other better For families that need help hearing each other ​ The BioGraffs method is for any clinician looking for ways to expand their repertoire of approaches, and interested in exploring narrative and storytelling techniques. Externalizing internal narratives affords an opportunity for people to create distance from events and become the protagonist of their own choosing in the stories of their lives. Read more here

I'm Jen Beman, and I invented BioGraffs based on a philosophy of storytelling I developed throughout my career as a documentary editor. I've spent 30 years understanding storytelling, the different ways stories can unfold based on different perspectives in a documentary, and how transformative storytelling can be for the storyteller themselves. ​ It started with talking about sex. In 2016 I started a monthly women's discussion group because I was interested in helping women share their stories about their relationships and their sexual experiences. I thought I might make a documentary about it. I invented an activity for that group that involved using cubes to stand for sexual values. It was so successful in my discussion group that I turned it into an interactive art installation called the Graphic Sex Project to help people tell their sexual stories, de-shame talking about sex, and open up new conversations about preferences. At multiple events across the country, I asked people to make a "graph" of a good sexual experience using colored cubes. The installations were a huge success. People could make a graph, or just browse the collection of graphs other people had made at previous installations. It was a featured event around the DC areas, as well as at several Sex Weeks events at Universities across the country. ​ What I discovered doing these installations was that this quirky way of looking at sexuality was a uniquely powerful way for a person to get a new perspective on their desires, and the graphs they created were a great conversation opener with a partner, sparking deep discussion on a typically difficult topic. ​ I soon realized that this was actually a very helpful way to think about any difficult topic. That couples could benefit from using this tool to open up tricky conversations, or just have a fun night of in-depth discussion of personal topics. I realized that the BioGraffs method creates the a structure that encourages active listening and the space for couples to really hear each other, expound on their perspective, and communicate better. I also saw how it could be a useful tool for therapists to share with their clients. I sought input from psychotherapists, psychologists, and counselors on how to make this tool work for people in clinical settings. In 2022, I teamed up with ACT therapist Joey Salvatore and Dr. Miranda Morris, a psychologist, and together we are working to make this valuable tool more widely available to people, including through therapists, counselors, coaches, and educators.

BioGraffs is a powerful tool to use on your own, but I also offer coaching to get more out of your BioGraffs experience. BioGraffs is unfamiliar to people so at first it might feel strange, but it's actually really easy once you get your hands on the cubes! Still, it does benefit from working through it with a guide, especially for particularly difficult topics. Jen is available for coaching to take you through the BioGraffs method for your unique issues, with a partner or on your own.

Before our coaching session, I'll send you a questionnaire to help me get a sense of your relationship dynamics and what you hope to achieve together. You'll also receive your BioGraffs kit in the mail—everything you need to begin building meaningful conversations. During our virtual session, I’ll guide you step-by-step through creating your first BioGraffs, using prompts carefully crafted to reflect your unique goals and experiences. We’ll explore the stories your BioGraffs reveal, helping you and your partner share your perspectives in a new way. Through this process, you'll practice active listening—fostering deeper understanding and connection. As you become more comfortable with the method, you’ll discover how these skills can carry over into everyday conversations, even beyond using the cubes. Together, we’ll also develop personalized prompts for you to continue working with on your own, so the insights and growth don’t stop when the session ends. My goal is to help you build communication tools that empower you long after our time together.

The BioGraff method with coaching is a good fit for couples who: ✔ want to be proactive around communication, problem areas, and intimacy. ✔ want to move forward but find it hard to make time and space in their busy lives to talk. ✔ have very different communication styles, but are committed to understanding each other. ✔ want to have have fun doing something brand new and different, and always looking for new ways to grow together. Coaching with Jen and the BioGraffs method might not be a good fit for: ✗ couples with years of built-up hurts, disconnection, and resentments (more intensive therapy with a licensed couples therapist is a better fit for you). ✗ couples where only one partner wants to do this (this method require active participation). ✗ relationships involving significant breaches of trust, addiction, abuse, or relational trauma (again, more intensive therapy with a licensed couples therapist might be a better fit for you).

BioGraffs is a coaching program and a method. It is not psychotherapy and is not intended to treat any mental health or mental condition. That said, it can be a powerful tool for the treatment of mental illness in the hands of a skilled clinician. I am not a licensed therapist, and the coaching I provide is not a substitute for couples therapy. The BioGraffs method is designed to guide you through a communication process, but its success depends on your commitment to actively engage and apply the tools provided. While I will help you navigate the method and provide support, the responsibility to do the work lies with you and your partner. Like any relationship tool, results will vary from couple to couple, and no specific outcomes are guaranteed. After our sessions together, you will be set up to continue to use the BioGraffs method for continued growth in your communication with each other.

I am not a therapist, I'm a coach. I've been doing workshops and individual sessions with people using this method for several years. I've also shared it with many couples and sex therapists who are using it with their own clients to talk about sex and other relationship topics. I developed this method as a way to help people talk about difficult topic. It started actually as an interactive art installation where I invited people to make BioGraffs of their preferred sexual flow. It was meant to get people talking about something that many people find difficult to talk about. People made BioGraffs and shared them with their partner as a fun and non-threatening way to say, "hey, let's talk about sex and what I like." It proved immensely successful. I soon realize that everything that made this a great way to talk about sex, also made it a great way to talk about almost anything that might be a little hard to talk about.

Yes, all coaching sessions are completely confidential. I take your privacy very seriously and provide a safe, non-judgmental space for you and your partner to explore your communication challenges.

Absolutely! That's the whole point. The BioGraffs kit is designed to be used regularly. The more you use it, the more you will learn to say through this method. After our sessions, you’ll have the knowledge and tools to continue using the method for regular check-ins, date nights, or when difficult topics arise. It’s a method you can come back to again and again, even when you just want to have fun being creative and talking.

I'm Jen Beman, and I invented BioGraffs based on a philosophy of storytelling I developed through my career as a documentary editor. I've spent 30 years understanding storytelling, and the different ways stories can unfold based on different perspectives in a documentary. Talking about Sex ​ In 2016 I started a monthly women's discussion group because I was interested in helping women share their stories about their relationships and their sexual experiences. I thought I might make a documentary about it. I invented an activity for that group that involved using cubes to stand for sexual values. It was so successful in my discussion group that I turned it into an interactive art installation called the Graphic Sex Project to help people tell their sexual stories, de-shame talking about sex, and open up new conversations about preferences. At multiple events across the country, I asked people to make a "graph" of a good sexual experience using colored cubes. The installations were a huge success. People could make a graph, or just browse the collection of graphs other people had made at previous installations. It was a featured event around the DC areas, as well as at several Sex Weeks events at Universities across the country. ​ What I discovered doing these installations was that this quirky way of looking at sexuality was a uniquely powerful way for a person to get a new perspective on their desires, and the graphs they created were a great conversation opener with a partner, sparking deep discussion on a typically difficult topic. ​ BioGraffs is Born ​ I soon realized that this was actually a very helpful way to think about any difficult topic. That couples could benefit from using this tool to open up tricky conversations, or just have a fun night of in-depth discussion of personal topics. I realized that the BioGraffs method creates the a structure that encourages active listening and the space for couples to really hear each other, expound on their perspective, and communicate better. I also saw how it could be a useful tool for therapists to share with their clients. I sought input from psychotherapists, psychologists, and counselors on how to make this tool work for people in clinical settings. ​ In 2022, I teamed up with ACT therapist Joey Salvatore and Dr. Miranda Morris, a psychologist, and together we are working to make this valuable tool more widely available to people, including through therapists, counselors, coaches, and educators.

Yes! I offer one on one sessions and can also arrange in-person or virtual training for your practice's team members. Contact me for more details.

You can cancel your session up to 24 hours in advance, and either re-book or request a refund of a pro rata amount. The cost of the BioGraffs Mag Plus is $110 and is not refundable.

You can book your first session directly through the "Book Now" button on my website. Once you purchase a package, you’ll be able to schedule all three sessions at times that work for you.